Question 1

I'm nervous about reading this page. The early days of the pandemic were traumatic and exhausting for me. Now you're telling me that it's not over? That's scary, and I kind of want to stop reading.

Accepted Answer

It makes a lot of sense that you feel nervous. We're really grateful that you're here reading -- you're doing a brave thing. While it's true that the pandemic isn't over, we also have so much more knowledge and tools than we had in 2020. This page is meant to share that knowledge and those tools.

Question 2

Things have to get back to "normal," because I care about my life and want to keep living it. Without "normal," how can things be okay?

Accepted Answer

Oh, friend! So many disabled people know your pain. Changes in abilities or health status are a hallmark of disability experience for many of us. We've learned by necessity to mourn as needed and then to furiously, relentlessly, creatively adapt.

And, we disabled people are here to tell you: It will be okay. It probably won't be quite the same, but things don't need to be the same to be okay. You might even find, as you adapt and live into this new reality, that you make unexpected discoveries, or find joyous surprises -- "not the same" might sometimes mean "wow, actually better!" And even in the places where "not the same" does mean "more challenging," that doesn't have to mean that you lose the core things that make life worth living -- you just might need to access them in different ways, with different creative workarounds that eventually become part of your new routine. And -- we'll be real -- there will be some true losses, but not nearly as many as you think, and you don't have to get stuck inside of them; you can mourn them and let them move through you, freeing you to move through our new world.

Question 3

I really need to socialize and be in community for my mental health. Are you saying I can't do that?

Accepted Answer

Not at all! Most high-risk people need socializing and community just as much as you do -- and we've been deprived of it during this pandemic (and even before this pandemic) to an extent that is probably hard for you to even imagine. What we want is for you to join with us in the project of making social life and community as accessible as possible to everyone, including us. The good news is that we have SO many tools that we can combine to help us gather safely. It's not a question of not gathering, but of gathering in creative, adaptive, intentional ways.

Question 4

I hear what you're saying about adapting. But making these changes is hard and stressful, and some things just aren't quite like they used to be.  Don't my needs matter too?

Accepted Answer

Yes, your needs absolutely matter. And, sometimes our needs can matter but we still need to recognize that the magnitude of our need is not the same as the magnitude of someone else's need. There's a lot of conversation right now about people's need for things to be "normal" -- but we want to point out a couple of things about that conversation.

First, as you will learn elsewhere on this page, we are still in a pandemic, and things simply are not the way they were pre-2020, as much as we might wish otherwise.

Second, relatively manageable adaptations now can actually protect YOU, yourself, from a much worse loss of "normalcy" -- in the form of post-covid health conditions, or an overburdened, toppling healthcare system that could put you at serious risk.

And finally, Judaism places great value on the "klal," or community. Prioritizing a vision of pre-2020 "normal" effectively means semi-permanently excluding high-risk people from public and communal life. The suffering of wearing an uncomfortable mask, while real, simply isn't the same as the suffering of not being able to be present in community because it isn't safe for you without a mask requirement. Let's rise to the spiritual challenge of this moment and prioritize community and safety for all.

Question 5

I feel skeptical and/or scared when you say that I can’t rely on the advice of the government and the CDC. I grew up having basic faith in government institutions, even if I don't like some politicians. Where else am I supposed to get my information? Why should I trust you more than the CDC?

Accepted Answer

This is a genuinely hard and scary, perhaps worldview-threatening experience. We're grateful that you're here taking the time to read the information and perspectives that we are presenting on this website. One thing that may help you to feel less alone is to consider is that, while facing the unreliability of public health institutions might be new for you, it's actually a longstanding experience for many disabled people, queer people, and people of color.

The CDC is, unfortunately, run by humans, and those humans have lots of weaknesses and ego challenges and blind spots and biases and political motives and places where they are stuck in outdated ways of thinking -- just like ALL humans do. And, observationally, the CDC has made some very questionable decisions during this pandemic, ones that have been widely criticized by medical associations as mainstream as the AMA. This doesn't mean that there's nothing at all we can trust; it just means that we have to do our own searching, seeking, and critical evaluation.

It definitely has been hard to find reliable information during this pandemic. That's one reason we created this website -- and we commit to providing you with reliable information based on trustworthy, cited sources as much as we possibly can. Another very helpful resource that you might want to check out is the People's CDC, an independent project aimed at providing a public health perspective based in principles of equity, care, and social responsibility.

Question 6

Most of my friends, and most other institutions, are acting like the pandemic is pretty much over. It's hard and scary to go against the grain of what everyone else is doing.

Accepted Answer

It's absolutely hard when you have to go against the grain like this -- most humans are naturally wired to look to those around them for social signals and validation. The challenge of going against the grain is especially great if your life hasn't put you in a position like this before. Disabled people and queer people are two groups who might have wisdom to share to help you feel less alone. On that note, feeling less alone really does help -- is there anyone you know who might be on the same page as you, to whom you could reach out to talk about covid equity and this website?

While this is hard, it's also an opportunity. Think of all the harm that's been done in human history by people who weren't "bad people," but who -- like most people -- just went along with the flow of what everyone around them did and believed. (The bystander effect is real!) Now -- right now! -- YOU have a chance to take a different path, to refuse to be that bystander. This moment is presenting us all with an immense opportunity for moral courage. It's hard, but the hardest things in life can be the most worthwhile.

Question 7

I have young kids who need to go to school. They’re too young to mask, and/or I can’t always be there to make sure they mask. It’s scary to think about risks to them that I can’t fully control.

Accepted Answer

This is so hard. Thank you for your bravery in continuing to read this page.

The first thing we want to remind you of is that this is NOT your fault. Your kids are being failed by our society as a whole -- not by you. You've been doing your best to protect them with the information and tools that you have. We're here to help by giving you more information and more tools.

One thing that may help to remember is that even though there are scary things you can't fully control, you do still have agency, and knowledge is power. In particular, you should know that covid is not an all-or-nothing deal -- it makes a big difference if you can help your kids get reinfected fewer times, even if you can't keep them from getting infected at all. You might want to take a look at the range of kids' N95s listed on the Project N95 website, or ask your kids' friends to take a quick, cheap rapid test before a playdate, or build an affordable Corsi-Rosenthal box air filter for your child's classroom. If you can find the energy, you might band together with others to advocate for covid protections in your child's school or at your shul.

You're doing so much. You've got this. We're glad you're here, reading and learning.

Advanced Covid FAQ